If You could Only Hear Me

If You Could Only Hear Me:

These are the words from a woman in a coma, this could have been the words spoken from a person you
loved and lost once they slipped into a coma. This could have been their final thoughts; these are the
words they would have liked to have spoken if only they had one more chance to speak.
I am inside of my body but I am outside of it at the same time.
How could that be? Perhaps it is my spirit trying to leave my body, lying there in the bed.
I see my family members, I see the doctors and nurses hovering over my head. I can hear their
conversations. The doctors are saying there is no more hope of life left in me.
The nurses are looking at me with forlorn looks of pity and care. My family is looking at me with glances,
some of hope and some of despair.
“ Wait Doctor!, What do you mean I am going to die?” , “I still have lots of things I need to get done. I
need to kiss my children and husband one last time and tell them how dearly I love them. I need to
finish that book I said I was going to write. I need to get that invention produced that I have been
holding onto secretly for years in fear someone would steal my idea. I need to pray more often and
earnestly daily. I need to help the less fortunate and visit the sick and elderly. I need to pray for my
family, friends, co-workers and yes, even my enemies. I long once more to smell the scent of freshly
cut green grass and the smell of fresh rain on the crisp dry dirt in the summertime. I need to go on that
vacation spot of a lifetime that I have always wanted to travel to. I need to spend more time with my
daughters, sons, sisters, brothers, and friends and less time watching TV.
I want to speak but somehow the sounds are not coming out so will someone please tell Uncle John
who is leaning over me right now to stop breathing on me , he smells like he took a bath in alcohol. Will
someone tell my siblings and cousins to stop fighting over who is going to get my things after I die. Will
someone tell my children that I love them and will be watching over them from Heaven, Yes, I do believe
I am going to Heaven once I take my last breath. Will someone tell my family for me to cherish every
moment left on this earth together and to not mourn me too long. Remember the good times we
shared together.
I wish I could tell you that I hear you talking and arguing with each other. I wish I could tell you that the
hearing is the last thing to go on a dying person, so talk to me as if I could hear you. I wish I could tell
you to tell me you love me over and over again, and I wish I could tell you back, and you hear me
because I am screaming it out loud, but no sound is coming from my mouth. In fact, my mouth is not
even moving but my heart is screaming it out to the top of my lungs, “I LOVE YOU TOO!” Oh God!! Why
can’t they hear me!!” There, a tear just fell from the corner of my eye, see this is a sign that I can hear
you. I am blinking my eyes for you, it is not a reflex as the doctors have told you.
I now hear the doctors saying, “ Time of death, 11:43pm.”
I hear my dead mother calling my name, I see my dead father smiling at me, I see the baby I lost in
childbirth holding out her little hand to me…I feel a sense of peace, overwhelming peace and calm. I
feel a sense of warmth and love, overwhelming love! How can I resist this feeling of love and
indescribable peace? I want to remain here forever. I want this more than life!! I feel my spirit moving
further and further away from my body. I see my loved ones weeping. I want to tell them don’t worry, I
am going to a better place. A place of eternal peace and eternal love. I am going to the home that
Christ has prepared for me. It is a lovely mansion! I see many mansions! I see Angels too, thousands of
them. You cannot see them with the natural eye, but they are all around you on earth too!! I can see
them. They watch over my loved ones day and night. They intercede for us on earth in human form and
spiritual forms.
God has something he wants me to tell everyone. He is coming back!! Soon!!
written by Ella Shines Goldsmith
This was written by Ella Shines Goldsmith, exactly one month and 5 days after she lost her younger sister
who passed away after slipping into a coma. She was in a coma for 2 months before she pas passed away after slipping into a coma. She was in a coma for 2 months before she passed. This is
dedicated to her sister, Ruby Shines Hertzock ( March 31, 1962 - June 19, 2017).

A Palace Built from Love

A Palace built from Love in Mississippi by Ella Shines Goldsmith

         A Palace built from Love in Mississippi   

                                         by Ella Shines Goldsmith

                       

    This is the palace that Dennis built!  The Rev. H.D. Dennis that is the man who built this 

    palace out of love for his darling wife, Mary Martin Dennis, his 4th wife.    What started out

as a normal country grocery store has transformed into an unbelievable work of folk art that

has been photographed many, many times from people all over the world from the U.S, to

 Germany and beyond.   When the Rev. Dennis proposed to Margaret, he promised her that 

"If you marry me, I will turn your store into a palace".  Little did he realize then that his

promise would end up being a great work of art for the entire world to marvel at and enjoy.  

Aunt Margaret and Rev. Dennis on their .day. Photo copyrighted

                                       

Aunt Margaret and Rev. Dennis in early years

Aunt Margaret and Rev. Dennis in their later years

 Growing up in the family, as children, my siblings and I would visit my grandmother and my great aunt Margaret, sister to my grandmother Mentha Martin.  We thought her husband,  Rev. Dennis was an old eccentric man who had nothing but time on his hands and was bored so he would paint signs 

and paint bricks bright bold red, yellow, pink and white and write gospel messages on plywood

 and paint them red.

We had no idea this would become what folklorist call Vernacular Southern Folk Art.  We had no 

idea that it would be recognized by a former Mississippi State Governor, published in many books and would be featured at Museums, on TV, Newspapers, and even a Film Documentary featuring the couple and the place known inVicksburg, Mississippi as Margaret's Grocery Store.  

Rev. Dennis spent over 40 years transforming the store into a miraculous work of art, he 

meticulously placed thousands of mardi gras beads, buttons, balls, flowers and glued them to the walls,ceilings, and even outfitted an entire school bus to be a mini church to draw attention to people

 so that he could preach the Gospel of the Lord to them.  

The Church Bus

The Ceiling in the Store /Rev Dennis Artwork

The front of the Church Bus

Sadly, this place that Rev. Dennis and my aunt Margaret Dennis worked so hard and so long for

is in ruins,  it was bequeathed to the church they attended for many years in Margaret's Will and

unfortunately, the church was unable to maintain and preserve the building and signs have been vandalized and removed.  The colors on the bricks are fading, some have fallen down, and the store itself has succumb to mother nature and the wood is eaten up by termites and wind and rain.  Rev. Dennis passed away in 2012 at the age of 96 and my aunt Margaret passed away at the age of 94. 

I recently made a trip back to the site this month on September 6,2015 and was so saddened to see what had become of a promise  to a wife to build her  a beautiful palace and many years and hours of hard work and one of a promise once fulfilled is now slowly fading away into ruins.   The brightly colored paint on the signs have faded.  The grass has overgrown the bus like the tides of time have erased the memory of the hustle and bustle of people coming from all over the world to photograph and listen to the sermons that Rev. Dennis would echo out loudly and proudly of the Lord Jesus and his message that this is " The house of prayer for all people to come to worship!" 

The church bus, now overgrown with trees and faded paint and rust

The Signs removed and stolen from the bus

The store now, boarded up to keep out vandals

The current condition of store in ruins

Efforts are now underway to begin the Preservation of Margaret's Grocery Store which has been a tourist stop and a part of Mississippi's History in the city of Vicksburg for many years.  The problem is the lack of funding that is necessary to restore, repair, and repaint the store to get it to it's near original appearance.  There have been many efforts in the past to save Margaret's Grocery by the local Arts Commission and citizens in the area but unfortunately all have been fruitless, but as a family member with a undying faith, love and passion I have for my family, I do believe that this can be done and all hope is not lost to restore it  and turn it into a museum.  My aunt Margaret acquired and opened the store with her first husband Abie Rogers in 1944. She met Rev. Dennis in 1979 at her church and he asked her to marry him, she agreed to marry him and the rest is history, a beautiful story of love, devotion and of keeping a promise.   

Margaret's Grocery has been nominated one of 10 Most Endangered Places in Mississippi by the Mississippi Heritage Trust Foundation. This is a significant step in helping to get the store funding but is not a guarantee that it will happen but will be helpful in pointing a light on what has happened to the Margaret's Grocery Store and hopefully get funding started and restoration efforts underway.    (This article was originally written in 2015)

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